IT HAS BEEN SAID THAT WE ARE products of our pasts. And while this is true, we often let our focus take root in the negative aspects of someone’s nature without even giving them a chance to get up to bat.
How many times have we refused to give someone a chance because we’ve heard about their past before we have even met them? Sometimes we meet them, like them and then find out about their past. If their past was negative in some way, we may abandon any form of a relationship without taking any more time to know them.
Getting amnesia stops the attraction to the negative immediately and allows you to remain in a position of unconditional regard and acceptance.
You don’t have to know someone’s past to treat them with human regard. In fact, it’s best that you don’t know their past until you’ve had a chance to experience them for a period of time, thus making and trusting your own observations and feelings.
When first meeting someone, we may ask them how many times they’ve been married, how many children they have, and what, exactly, they’ve done for a living up until now. We tend to hold onto the past as if it protects us from them in some way.
Oddly enough, the opposite frequently happens. We want to prepare ourselves to avoid the worst. We believe that if we just remind them of their past often enough and in diplomatic ways, they will not ever do, whatever “it” is again! Should work, right?
What do these constant reminders bring? Most likely, a repeat of the past, because we aren’t envisioning anything new, different or better. Chances are, even if they did do something new, we’d probably miss it because our focus would be on remembering the past.
What if we knew nothing about each other’s pasts? Getting amnesia allows us to be fully present and accountable for ourselves and our actions. Getting amnesia encourages speaking to situations directly and as they occur instead of expecting the worst and assuming we already know the answers for someone else.
You have already survived the past. Why allow it to hurt you or others further?
Reflect upon your present blessings,
of which every man has many;
not on your past misfortunes,
of which all men have some.
-CHARLES DICKENS
